“Asscrown," I muttered under my breath as I headed to my next class. I wasn't proud of swearing at a complete stranger, no. but he started it.

Noah matched my pace. "Don't you mean 'assclown'?" He looked amused.

"No," I said, louder this time. "I mean asscrown. The crown on top of the asshat that covers the asshole of the assclown. The very zenith in the hierarchy of asses," I said, as though I was reading from a dictionary of modern profanity.

"I guess you nailed me then.”
Michelle Hodkin

Sunday, April 12, 2015

Chapter 7

He woke up with a headache and sore muscles. Rubbing his scalp he groaned and tried to take in his surroundings. A ceiling...so a room. Obviously. He blinks twice to try and see more clearly. A suite perhaps? He realizes he's on a bed. He realizes it's not his own.

He sits up with a start and curses under his breath as his head starts to swim. Okay Kaden. What happened last night? How did you get here? Are you missing any body parts?

Two hands. Two feet. 5 digits on each. Two eyes, a nose, mouth, two ears. He reaches below the covers and sighs in relief. Everything is accounted for. There's no one next to him, but he knows he must have been here for a job. 5 thousand dollars sit on the bedside table, but he has no recollection of what he did to deserve that much money for one job. It hurts to think so he decides to try and make a deduction from the clues around him.

He opens his hands to look at his palms and he sees deep purple marks where something had to have been digging in his skin. He throws off the covers and his ankles have matching imprints.

"Bondage? Did I do bondage last night?" He has memory of being at the club under CCC (City Community College) waiting to go and meet a customer...then he bought himself a drink. He saw some girl who he swears is always drunk that he's seen around once or twice. She was dancing and he saw the outline of a scar on her chest. In the time he looked away a guy sat next to him and started making conversation. Next thing he knows he's in a haze; not sure if what he gets flashes of is a dream or what really happened. A red room made of satin. A large cross pinned against the wall. Perhaps he was put up on the cross and tied down with rope. A nightmare manifested from his fear of punishment by his father due to his...preferences. Or just a frisky ass dude who has way too much money and out of control wants.

"Had to be drugged. Must have been." He stands up and picks up his clothes off the floor gritting his teeth through the pain shooting up from his anus to the rest of his body. "Fuck." he whispers through gritted teeth. Tears sting his eyes and he starts shaking as the stinging continues to burn hotter than anything he could imagine.

He considers calling Mona, but she can't know about what he's been doing. He sits back on the bed he woke up in, takes a few breaths to calm his impulse to yell out in pain as it persists, and then gets up and walks to the kitchen of the apartment. Finding a bad of peas and a Styrofoam container full of cold pasta, he sits on the peas and hungrily eats the pasta. Now, he just needs to get out of her without his ass ripping in two.

Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Chapter 6

"Guess what came in the mail today!"

"Guess what came in the mail today!" the older man says excitedly.

"What, dad?" he asks not looking up from his laptop.

"A letter from UCLA. I think it's a sign. You're meant to go there son." His dad nudges his shoulder and smiles proudly. Kaden takes the letter from his fathers hands, and puts it on the table in front of him before resuming his time on Tumblr. His father sighs and picks up his car keys from off the counter. "Michael will be back from soccer in 10 minutes. Let him in when he knocks please." 

Kaden grunts in response and continues to scour the internet, entranced in the world of YAOI and what it has to offer him. Johnathan looks back once before reluctantly heading to his little bookshop. His store isn't the best nor most modern bookstore in Connecticut, but he prides himself on the hospitality that they offer. Johnathan has two sons, Michael (his youngest only 10) and Kaden (Now 17). While Michael is the social one who likes to be involved in sports and clubs, Kaden is the responsible one. Always making sure that the family is on time with bills, meals, and finances overall. 

His sons are his pride and joy and he would sell his own soul for the two of them to feel happy. Yes, he wishes the best for them and aspires to be their role model; however, his sons have slightly different feelings towards the actions of their single father. Do the boys love their dad? Of course. Do they want him to be happy? Sure. But they feel like burdens. Ever since their mother left 5 years ago Johnathan has been left to take care of the boys on his own. While his ex-wife was on some beach in Argentina with some Bolivian model, Johnathan raised the boys under a strict Baptist hand in hopes that they would turn out well. Barely able to take care of the boys on his meager earnings, Kaden took the initiative to get a job to help. 

Starting as a cashier at a clothing shop Kaden was able to help out some with the money the family needed. When that job turned into something more he kept it hidden. And when his father found he was making more than the typical teen folding clothes Kaden lied and said that he was promoted at the store Mona worked at. When Mona asked why he needed to lie, he lied again and said he was doing people's math work. When his dad assumed he and Mona were dating, he didnt have the heart (or the balls) the tell him that he was gay. When he moved away to Dreamwood to continue his job and go to school he went to community college to save money for himself and his father. 

"Helloo? Kaden. I said guess what came in the mail today." His brother Michael says over the receiver.

"Oh, what?" 

"I got a hundred bucks from mom. And a postcard that says 'Wish you were here'." he scoffs and there's rustling on the other side of the line "He boyfriend Juan signed it too. Dick."

"He you're 13. Calm the language bro."

"Whatever...Kaden?" his brother sounds nervous. 


"Do you not want to see me and dad? Are you ashamed of us or something, because I'm sorry if I did anything...and i'm sorry if dad did anything. But we haven't seen you in almost 2 years and I miss you...no homo." his brother admits. The end of his confession kind of hurts, but he can't explain why. 

"No, no, no. It's not that. Its just...its nothing. I'd love to have you guys visit. Just...let me know when you're coming and Mona and I will fix the place up." he says. His brother cheers and then he talks to someone who has entered the room. "Ugh, I got to go. Church with dad. We'll see you soon though, yeah?"

"Yeah. Of course. Happy birthday again."

"Thanks. Tell Mona she owes me a birthday present. I  accept money and/or blow jobs, cause ya know. Shes hot as hell."

"Oh fucking hell. GO away. Fucking perv. Talk to you later." Kaden laughs and rubs his temples at his brothers humor.

"HEY I'M SERIOUS THOUGH IF SHE EVER WANT TO SUCK MY-" Kaden hangs up and tosses the phone away before Michael spews out more inappropriate comments. He misses his brother he does, and he misses his dad. But, he knows they would get weird after finding about his sexual orientation....and especially if they found out about his real job...Mona included. He just hopes he can keep it all together when they come to visit. Maybe, just maybe it won't all come tumbling down.

Saturday, February 21, 2015

Chapter 5

"Hey, Michael just texted me." Kaden says with a smile. Mona pauses the movie playing on the TV, an Audrey Hepburn movie that they've seen over 100 times. But lets be honest, you can never see an Audrey movie too many times.

"Oh really?! What did he say?"

"He wants to come and visit...him and dad." his smile melts and his pulse quickens in anxiety.  Mona purses her lips and picks at her nail polish.

"You already know how I feel about the whole thing. You should invite them both, and then tell them at the same time. I don't know why you've got this idea that you'll be disowned. Your dad loves you, and he's proud of you." She glances up and smiles distantly. "Even though you're gay. Hell if if you were a Queen." She opens her mouth excitedly and spreads her fingers out. "Fabulousssss." she wiggles her digits, and Kaden snorts in amusement. He puts down his phone and runs a hand through his blond tresses. "I'll pretend to be your girlfriend this last time, but if you don't tell them before they leave...I will." She plays the movie and moves her lips to the words of the film. "Also, I'm going to be playing the 50s housewife when they come, so make it quick. Or I'll make a scene."

As Kaden was making his way to O'Harley's, for another unfortunate encounter ordered by the She-Devil herself, he noticed a steady stream of people walking up the road towards that creepy street. Who puts kids, crazy people, and senile oldies on the same road? Have they never seen a horror movie?

He looks down at the red shirt he has on and starts to wish he had gone with the blue one. His walk to the pub is uneventful other than the fact that he slick started to follow one of his favorite artists like a creepy fan. He wants to ask Forrest a hell of a lot of questions but he knows that it'd probably piss the guy off. He split off from following him when he went up Creepy Street. 

"What's happening up there?" Kaden asks under his breath. Its only 3pm. What could have possibly happened? He asks the guy next to him.

"Apparently some guy jumped off the roof. Now there's a crazy running around."  The guy says. He had some kind of accent. Scottish maybe. He puts down his lager and puts out his hand. "Cole."

"Kaden." The younger boy replies. "Where you from Cole?"

"Ireland." he says with a grin.

"Oh sweet. I've always wanted to visit there. I hear it's nice."

"It is. The most beautiful country there is." Cole says proudly. "Let me buy you a beer Kaden." he offers.

"Thanks, man. I appreciate it." 

10 minutes go by and the fellas have easy conversation. Kaden likes the guy. Seems genuine. Nice heart. He could see the two hanging out again, but he doesn't want to seem...like hes hitting on the guy or anything. "So what brings you here?" Kaden asks. The guy moves his head from side to side. 

"Family issues. Got stuck in quite a...quite a mess." Cole admits. "And you?"

"Some of the same. Also involved with some shit I don't need to be in." Kaden says. He looks out the window and sees a blue Sudan. What is with these horny assholes and Sudan's. "Actually, I got to go. It was real man, I'll see you around. Have fun on Creepy Street." he says lightly.

"Ah fuck off." Cole responds with a laugh. "I'm just checking it out." 

Kaden shrugs and salutes before walking out the door. Back to business. Back to his other reality.

Sunday, February 8, 2015

Chapter 4

To: Mona 
Be home late, party 2night. I cant miss it. Dont wait up.
Sent 8:43pm

He sighs and closes out of Mona's contact. He hates lying to her. He really does, but she wouldn't understand if she knew the truth. It's better that she just thinks he's a party crazed druggie...

SO many lies. He's starting to forget what his reality is and what it is that he made up for the "sake of others"; who is he and what does he even want anymore? The amounts of lies he finds himself living in is suffocating, it's like they have ganged up on him and decide to trap him in a corner to steal him of whatever they can get their hands on. He can only be relieved by calling on another, only to have that lie pull out a new weapon and help in cornering him in the back alley that is his life.

From: The Devil Incarnate (8:50pm)
Behind the Sultry Poultry. Now.
Seen 8:50pm

His feet are full of lead and it hurts to step toward the chicken-strip club-eating establishment.  He hasn't worked for 2 months now. He's surprised hes been at peace for this long to be honest.; then again he is the best that she has. He wears his best pair of black skinny jeans and a dark blue graphic tee. The black Vans on his feet give no arch support be he wont be walking for much longer as long as whoever needs him has a car. Rounding the corner of the Sultry Poultry he finally sees her again. She makes the hairs on his neck stand on end, her blatant beauty accompanied by the shitty personality that lies underneath is disgusting. He dons a smile and throws his arms out in a hugging manner.

"Alicia! Long time no see, you look great." he starts. She turns around and her midnight black hair whips behind her. Her painted red lips pull up into a grin.

"If it isn't my favorite absent little whore." she says dropping the grin she had put on. Her hands perch on her hips and suddenly Kaden feels the still chill in the area. He drops his smile as well and takes in a breath before cutting to the chase.

"What do you want?"

"You, back at work. Your regulars have been asking about you, and you know how much money they pay for you. Your little break has cost me a shit ton of money, about 50 thousand. If you don't make it back plus some I'll skin you alive and throw you in the pit." she deadpans.

"By when?" he asks quietly. He feels his nose burn from the call of oncoming tears.

"Next month. Or I'll fuck you up. I'm a nice person, I'll arrange all the necessary meetings and transactions...but if you fuck me over...you'll regret it." she turns her back on him and walks back to the street. His heart speed up and the air is coming in less and less now. He can't breathe and before he knows it he passes out.

He wakes up in the spot he passed out in, with full memory of why he's here. The tears almost come...but he refuses to let them. Not because of Alicia. His phone buzzes and he pulls it out to realize he has a message.

From: The Devil Incarnate (8:59pm)
First customer. The Pit.10:00. A 500.
Seen 9:37pm
His walk to the pit is uneventful. Some random ass bonfires about with people scattered about. If only he could sit there and not worry about anything. He sits near the edge of the pit and stares down into it for God knows how long only half hoping he may fall in.

"Fuck you. You ca… Artichoke. Antidisestablishmentarianism. Michael Cera’s unbelievably sexy pencil mustache." 

The words make him look up from the darkness and to a man who seem to be having some sort of internal battle of sorts. Multiple personality disorder or something? Please don't let this be the guy he's supposed to suck off. He walks over to him, unnoticed, in hopes of finding out his problem.
"SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP!!!!!!" The man screams.
“Hey. Are you alright?” He asks worried.
“Oh. Sorry. I was just…”
“Hey. It’s alright. No need to explain. I just wanted to make sure that you were alright." Kaden says softly. There's something off about the guy, no doubt about it. He opens his mouth to further his inquisition when a red Sudan pulls up. The window rolls down and a man sits at the driver's seat with sunglasses on.

It's night time. What a douche.

Without another word he walks to the car and braces himself for another one of many, rough, late nights.

Monday, January 19, 2015

Chapter 3 (Apt 408)


The whole goddamn 3rd floor got hot-boxed.

He’s stuck between feeling impressed, jealous, and somewhat disgruntled in the people he calls his neighbors. He hasn’t felt this way since he was in high school and at his first and last basketball game the student section threw, correction frisbee’d, toast on the court and yelled ‘toast em up!’ to get the audience pumped up. Some kind of show of support for the star player at the time Kendall Loafawitz.

He’s been standing...well slouching against a wall near the elevator alongside some others whom he’s seen around the city. Looks like hes not alone in his decision to take advantage of the situation. Its snowing balls outside and he would go and fuck around in it, but Kaden has been absorbing a hell of a lot of pot smoke for about an hour now. He’s still upset with how stupid the people on this floor are, but that doesn't mean he’s taking the high road and letting it go to waste.

He pushes himself off the wall and feels the blood in his body leave his head.

“Oh shit...:” he laughs lightly to himself and knows its time to go eat and sleep this off.

He trudges down the staircase in hopes of going out in the snow for a little while. Snow is cool. He hears a sploosh and looks down to his feet. Water?

He can make out the number two on the door, and realizes that hes on the second floor. There couldn't be any snow all the way up here…

He’s burning daylight, but he wants to know why its so wet.

He giggles to himself.

Wet. That's what she said. “But I wouldn’t know much about that now would I?” He keels over in laughter and nearly slips down the stairs. Composing himself he pens the door and realizes the ground is soaked. Gross. He scrunches up his face. Clogged toilet...of COLOSSAL PROPORTIONS?!

“Broken pipe.”

He looks up from the ground and tilts his head to the side.

“Do I know you?” he asks. The stranger’s eyes widen before settling on neutrality.

“No. I don’t think so.” the stranger says. He nods and then walks off. Kaden scratches his head puzzled. He knows that voice. He swears he does….


The music plays louder than it needs to in his headphones, but it doesn't bother him.
The heater is on higher than it should be, but he doesn’t care. The blanket is wrapped too tight around his body, but he can barely feel it.

Going outside was so not the smart move. Thank God he got a flu shot. He sniffles and face plants against the couch. The phone rings, but he can’t hear it. 10 minutes of consistent buzzing against his back later he unravels from his fortress of solitude and looks at the screen.


“Fuck...fuck.” he’s dead. She doing to have his guts for garters. He looks back at Mona’s room to make sure she’s locked in there doing whatever it is that she does when shes not at work. His pulse speeds up and he knows that he is very much in danger of heart attack at this point. Ignore her...or face her.

He’s waited this long. One more day won’t hurt right? He turns the device off and puts his headphones back in his ears.

Starting the last song over he hides under his blanket once more in hopes of disappearing before Alicia comes looking for him.

….Another shot of Henny and I’m faded asking ‘how long does this drug called fame last?’ That’s deep….

“THAT’S WHO THAT WAS!” he exclaims as he sits up suddenly. Forrest. Forrest Whitman! He’s like...one of his favorite artists.

“KADEN SHUT UP I’M TRYING TO WATCH NETFLIX.” Mona’s shouts scare him into silence. He’ll quiet down, but he’s not going to drop it just yet.

Sunday, January 11, 2015

Chapter 2 (Apt 408)

"When is your dad going to visit?"

"What do you mean when is he going to visit? He isn't. Not as long long as my hair is yellow."

"Your hair isn't yellow. Its blonde you butt munch."

"Blonde, yellow, orange, peach. Its all the same."

"You're an awful roommate. I'm going to kick you out." At this Kaden closed his text book and turned around the back of the couch to try to catch the eyes of the short blue hair girl. He knows shes just kidding, she needs him just as he needs her. The bills aren't going to pay themselves, and living alone at 19 is a lonely life that neither of them want to face. He pouts his lips and blinks his hunter green eyes before responding.

"C'mon Mona. You need me. I promise I won't speak my mind ever again." he says with a cock of his eyebrow.

Mona laughs and puts down the dish towel from her position wiping down the counters in the kitchen. "You're a dick, have I ever told you that?"

Kaden turns back around ignoring the chestnut colored girl in the kitchen. "You've told me once or twice."

He reopens the book that he sat next to him and looks at the pages without really seeing any words. Is this his Greek Mythology book or his Intro to the Russian Language book? The couch dips next to him and he ignores the intrusion while continuing to read his textbook.

"Революция была одной из эпических пропорций..."

"I know you don't want to talk about it...but we need to okay? Do you have a class today?


"Some party that you might ditch me for?"

He shrugs. "No."

"In that case we'll talk when I get back from work. Mike needs me to organize some files down at the radio station. Go have some fun. Stop studying." she pats his leg and gets up of the couch to go get dressed for her shift leaving Kaden in the middle of the living room surrounded by notes.

He picks up his cell phone from his jacket pocket and checks the time.


Maybe he'll go get some food while Mona is out. He stands up dusts the chip crumbs off himself. After he grabs his wallet, keys, and checks to make sure he has his phone, he leaves the apartment. Room 408's door looks identical to the other doors on this floor. Old with an awful peeling paint job. He shakes his head and jogs down to the car garage and hops into his car. Kaden starts the engine, checks his hair out in the rear view mirror and runs his hand through it in an attempt to tame it.

First he'll head down to the pizza place on Shellac and then maybe he'll head down to the Minute Clinic so that he can get a flu vaccine. Half his classes have been empty because of the flu outbreak after all.


"Its warm out tonight..."

"Weird huh? At least its not unbearable to be out here." Mona says in appreciation.

"You're right." he says distantly while squinting towards the sky in attempt to see any sign of the meteor shower that's supposed to happen tonight. The two of them snuck up to the roof and found a spot away from the entrance in hopes not to encounter anyone else who might sneak up. "I saw Brian today." he says with a smirk.

"The doctor at the clinic? The hot one?" she asks excitedly.

"Yep. He was there helping give out shots."

"He is yummy."

"Calm the hormones Mona." He says. She pushes his shoulder with both hands as hard as she can, he sways to the side and snickers.

"We should invite him over...and your dad."

"Mona..." he says in warning.

"I'm just saying. It would be a great way to start a conversation and brake the ice."

"For the nth time, I'm not telling my dad. Its hard enough as it is with me not getting into any big colleges." Kaden chews on his lip and looks back up and sees a glimpse of something flying across the sky. The shower is starting.

"I mean, I'm sure if we get some nice food and maybe put on some relaxing music with him over it'll be perfect and you'll want to tell him. We've been hiding this for the longest and I hate having to pretend like we aren't when he calls!"

"I'm not telling him I'm gay Mona!!"

The two go silent as they glare at one another and the sky falls around them.

Thursday, December 18, 2014

Chapter 1 (Apt 408)

The day started with his alarm blaring in its usual screechy and annoying tone. Kaden opened his eyes briefly to check the time and turned over almost immediately assuming that he could sleep in for another 5 minutes without harm.

A second passed before his eyes opened quickly and he sat up in his bed with a start; looking back to the dusty black clock with its crude red numbers he re-read the bright blinking digits.


Crap, he was SO late to picking up Mona from the bus stop. She was going to have his head on a spike if he didn't get there within the next 5 to 10 minutes.

Kaden threw the covers off his body and threw on a pair of grey joggers and a sweatshirt from some college his dad once wanted him to go to. He didn’t bother to check the news, weather, or even bothered to brush his teeth as he sprinted to the elevator of his apartment complex Dreamwood Terrace; He was then on his way out to the back parking deck. As he fumbled around in his sweatshirt pockets for his phone he realized he left his phone on the bedside table along with his wallet...and the car keys to his borrowed silver 1999 M3 BMW. It was his dads.

He began to slow down and sighed heavily, mentally face palming himself. As his head lolled back he closed his eyes and took in a deep breath.

Idiot. Take a breath, go back upstairs, and get your goddamned life together.

Once his thoughts had been collected, he began to make his way back up to his apartment on 4th floor; until he realized how cold and damp his feet felt.

Looking down he realized he wasn’t wearing socks or shoes...in the middle of December...in this foggy ass town. He groaned out of irritation and trudged back through the lobby and back to his room , the first on the left on the fourth floor of Dreamwood Terrace.


Some hours passed since he had picked up Mona from the bus, she had been locked up in her room since 9am and here he was heading down to the sub level of CCC (City Community College). His last lecture was over and it was now 6:45pm.

College sucks.

Pulling out his phone he began to check to see if the party was on for the night. The secret club under the school was great, but it wasn't active every night. As soon as he opened the rusty door that lead to the lowest level he felt the pulsing of the house music in his bones.

He smiled and felt the days stress evaporate he began to see the blinking lights and dancing bodies huddled and jumping to the electronic beats of the music. He takes of his own shirt and finds himself becoming one with the mass that has somehow taken on a life of its own.

They all move as one.

And then the power goes out.

The dancing stops. The laughing halts. The music cuts off.

The energy that was once going through the room is no more...

and then the hand lasers come on. One by one people pull out their phones and other devices and start to light the room up. The DJ grabs his phone and connects it to a speaker and the music is back on.

They might have just drained the city of power, but that doesn’t mean that their party is going to stop. Here, Kaden feels at home again.